Thursday, March 27, 2008

Farewell, K

Post-graduated five days ago. It rained intermittently the whole day, making my wish to see K during the rains true even thought it really screwed up the convocation for everyone's parents. Sigh, K never looked more beautiful. Wore a saree under a convocation gown that would keep slipping, too k batch photos, section photos, hip-hip-hurrayed, assembled in line, received my diploma, forgot to bow to the faculty, hugged friends, climbed up the amphi (which now in my mind seems like an amphi I've never been on) and realized only when one of the people I was congratulating said, 'Okay, bye', that it was probably the last time I'll ever meet/see most of those people. The feeling was pea-sized then. Later, took lots of photos with friends, with MC people or those that worked anyway, with family and Ammy clutching the degree, sorry, diploma with me, meeting people, being exasperated at the terrible dinner arrangements, being extremely exhausted, packing up the last remnants, dealing with Mom's stress at too much luggage, nearly losing my temper a zillion times and then finally, when everyone had left my room and I had to carry the one remaining bag, I mouthed 'Bye room, bye K', with my hands on the switchboard. As I flicked off each of the three switches one by one, something so routine and stared at my now bare room, my eyes smarted and I just couldn't keep away the tears. In order to avoid people, even though, I secretly desperately wanted to meet someone I knew, I didn't take the stairs to the upper floor and walked down my corridor and to the jeep that would take us to the hotel. I met doc on the way, and the tears I had been trying to hide then, just wouldn't stop and I ended up hugging her and crying, and she consoled me in her usual practical istyle. Walked on, deposited single bag in jeep and walked to the canteen for some last minute gifting. Got into the jeep and it started winding down the hill, and racing down the narrow, smooth roads of Calicut and I cried silently. Mom and sis sat quietly opposite me, making no comments. I messaged last goodbyes to people in hope of some consolation, some came, some reached late. But I was fine by then, just needed some hugs from Dad which I got later. I never thought I'd cry, but I did. Love you, K.

* * *

Ammy's the bright spot at home right now. Whenever she's around, the whole place is radiant and happy. Oh and it was so funny when during the Munnar trip, she kept chedofying the driver with her 'Aaanhs' and the driver kept calling her Ammaro instead of Ammaarah :))... made her sound like a car's diesel engine or something. She loves dad clapping and singing 'Yaara dildara meri Ammaarah' and will begin to clap the minute he does so. If he stops singing, she claps her hands as a reminding gesture and says 'Ammama' (her pronunciation of her name) and Baba starts singing again.

These are some photos of her before we left for K.

In the drawing room, looking out.

On all fours :D

Playing peek-a-boo ('Aiiee taa!' in Hyderabadi) with the curtains

The last post was my 300th. The huge delay before that was so that I could have a new template ready before I posted. To those who asked about the header, it was an image I was playing around with, a photo I'd taken of my dress when I accidentally managed to 'invert colors' in Paint... and loved the result!

Have lots to write about, musings over marriage etc. Should be back soon, now that I have a wireless connection at home! Yayy!


Dreamcatcher said...

Don't you always fall in love just when you need to leave?
Or is it just me who sentimentalizes and forgets the bad things and the stressful times, and gets all misty eyed? I guess that's goodbye to education for a while.
And now a different life beckons, good luck :)
Your nice by the way is a bundle of cuteness. The smile :), I could imagine how it could light everything up.

Dreamcatcher said...

Oh and I forgot to say, this. Lovely, lovely post. As is most of your writing, little snippets, and yet evocative and they freeze time.I wish you wrote more often. I am not making sense but I just realized I've been reading your blog for an awfully long time now. I feel old :(

mythalez said...

300 posts .. almost 4 years ...

I want it to continue on and on and on ... and on :)

and welcome back to hyd :D (yah i can say that!)

Argentyne said...

Ish, I guess when you're looking back on something, you always tend to forget the bad times. Remember reading some book on happiness (a kind of scientific analysis) that said that when you imagine things or try to look back at things, you always always have an un-realistic picture of what happened. To illustrate, the author said that suppose you're eagerly anticipating some joyful thing/event, you tend to think that when that day comes, you'll be deliriously happy, but what you tend to forget is that the same routine things you do today, will still remain to be done that day too... sort of bringing your joy down. It's true with things you dread too :)

Yeah, I'm already missing the feeling of college, books and friends. Specially after reading one of your last posts... Many thanks for the wishes and the compliments, and yes, when I see how many years of education I'm done with and look at younger cousins in 10th etc. I feel so so old :(

Doda, thanks a lot :)

pranav said...

"musings over marriage"

- I will wait for that!

Anonymous said...

- 'with MC people or those that worked anyway' : Who are these MC people?

- 'nearly losing my temper a zillion times' : maine tumhe pehle hee kaha tha kee tumhe Gussa bahut aata hai

- 'I secretly desperately wanted to meet someone I knew' : Who?

- Cute pics

Two sher I would like to quote about the Last day

1) 'hijr kee raat aur itni raushan ?'

2) 'inn beetein hue lamhon kee kasak aaj tou hogi..
Khaabon mein hee ho per mulaakaat to hogi'

Nicely written blog...